I Can Be An As*h**e

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I said it! I am not always reasonable, nor am I steady with my reactions when I feel like everything is spinning out of control. When I have too much on my plate to carry, it only takes but uncertainty to spiral out of control. Why is it that I act completely out of my nature?

Why is it that my thoughts are worth so much to me that my morality is thrown completely out the window? Its almost as though I am an innocent spectator, watching but frozen in time. I failed! I failed to be in control of the situation.

Our minds are consistently playing out our environments. What if ____ happens? I should ____, egh, it can wait until later. Why did I ____? If I ____, everything will work out. Why did they do that? Who do they think they are? Why is he such an as*h**e? You got to be kidding me, did that really just happen? We are personalizing our environments in a constant. Why? Why can’t I just shut up?

Every moment our minds are filtering through an unconscious process of generalization, deletion, and distortion. We believe that what we see could only be the truth. I see, therefore it is. Our feelings are bound to cause and effect. You did something to hurt me, therefore I hurt, therefore I am hurt because of you.


Generalization is when you allow your environments and circumstances to contain a definition belonging to your identity. EXAMPLE: My boss was rude to me, he must hate me. I hate my job because I am not good enough!


Deletion is when we filter the information we receive to focus on what seems relevant to us. EXAMPLE: I was having such a great day, my boss just had to ruin it!


Distortion is when you hear and see what is relevant to your understanding, bypassing what actually happened. EXAMPLE: My boss was complaining that no one does their job; My boss was trying to say that I don’t do my job.

The examples above are unconscious behaviors. It was the day that I realized that my mind was trapped in a cynical simulator that I began evaluating these instant reactions. So while I gain my instant reaction, I conclude with the hypothesis, maybe the boss has his own things going on in life that makes him respond the way he does. That we don’t actually know how much he has on his plate. We then can open up our minds to the fact that if we are doing the best we can, we can be proud of that, and have compassion for the boss.

Every moment is but a circumstantial choice. When we decide that we want something different, we can change what we are focusing on and what we delete. We can begin to notice our surroundings, notice that there is a much bigger picture that has nothing to do with us or our emotions. We can’t stop the clock, no matter how desperately we wish to take control.

When we stop making distinctions and begin picking apart our surroundings, with the conclusion that all things needed to take place, this is where we find enlightenment. Every action has an intention. If you choose to have a productive behavior, you gain productive results. If you decide to do nothing you find failure, loss, and disempowerment. You can avoid reality, but you can’t avoid the consequences from reality.

Moments are brought to us as experiences to grow our perception. But what is it that you gather from your experiences, what is the perception that you are building? Let’s face it! What we focus on, we believe, the manifestation of thought to reality! Replace the words you say to your inner chatter, that voice that never seems to take a break. You can go into a positive and resourceful state whenever and where ever you want by changing your focus!

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