Fall in love with pattern, not potential. Past behavior, not promise. –
In friendships, relationships when we fall in love with potential, we tend to believe that the other person acts the way they do uniquely for us. It negates the reality that generally, no matter who were are in relationship with as humans we fall back into patterns, patterns familiar to us. Sometimes good patterns, sometimes destructive patterns linked to past trauma.
Potential love is a reflection of self love. If they are good it’s because we are good, if they are bad it’s because we are bad; this is a sign you’ve fallen in love with potential, not patten. Potential is the dark reflection of you, it means you are trying to prove something through the other’s transformation. And often it means that they become your convenient, default excuse for all the things you need to work on within yourself. “I will xyz, once they will xyz”.
Falling in love with patterns reflects a soul conscious of it’s own beauty. Love of patterns accepts people for who they are and has no need to change them. It lets in what works and sets boundaries for what doesn’t. It is love that says; “I am enough.” You are enough and you don’t need anyone else to change in the world to feel significant, alive. You don’t need others to change to know it’s okay to change yourself.
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